"In 2013 my husband, Adam, and I got married. We had known each other for many years, and we knew that we wanted to start a family soon after getting married. After a year of marriage, we decided it was time to try to grow our family. It happened quickly and in September of 2015 we welcomed our first son, Greyson. He was the best baby, and when he was a year and a half we decided it was time to try to grow our family again. This time it took just short of a year and in February of 2018 we found out we were pregnant again. This time I felt different. I was anxious and felt like something might be wrong. At 8 weeks I passed a small blood clot and after calling the doctor, they got me in for an ultrasound. Adam and I went into the office very anxious, but we were happy to see a big heart beat and a happy little person on the screen. At 10 weeks we found out that I had a polyp on my cervix. This could cause some spotting, and I shouldn’t be concerned. At around 14 weeks I went in again concerned because I had had some bleeding. Again, I was told not to worry. That they couldn’t explain why this was happening, but that everything looked fine. At 19 weeks we went for our 20-week ultrasound. Again, everything looked fine. Our friends put on a small gender reveal for us, and we found out we would be having a girl. I was still feeling very anxious, but I was halfway and things would be getting better from here.
I, again, went for a routine check on July 5th at 22 weeks. The night before I had what felt like a contraction, but I had gone to bed and didn’t have any after. The morning of the 5th I woke up feeling sick and just uncomfortable. I told the doctor that I was having some shooting pains, and I just really didn’t feel right. She said that they had just checked me at my ultrasound and everything looked fine, so she didn’t feel the need to check me again. I went on my way. I headed to get a haircut, still feeling terrible. I went to pick up our oldest son, and at this point I was in a lot of pain. The doctor had told me it was probably an intestinal movement, and I shouldn’t be concerned. So, I took my sweet 2-and-a-half-year-old home where I continued to be in excruciating pain. I got in the bathtub and called my husband. He was working 20 minutes away. When he got home we ended up having to call the ambulance. Our friends were amazing and got to our house to take Greyson just as the ambulance got to our house. When we got to the hospital they took me to the ER, then immediately to labor and delivery. I knew what was happening, this was it, our baby was coming, and she was coming fast. The doctor pushed me into the room just in time for me to deliver our sweet 2nd SON, Adam Luehmann, Jr. (AJ). I thought that AJ was gone, but he took his first breath, and I looked at the doctor with great hope. The doctor informed us that his lungs were too underdeveloped to be able to do anything. Adam and I were able to hold our sweet boy for every earthly breath that he took. We were able to take pictures with him, and hold him for over 24 hours before the funeral home took him away.
We were broken. We didn’t know what to do, and we really missed our baby. We did find out that my doctors believe that the placenta never fully attached when I was pregnant with AJ. This is what caused bleeding and preterm labor.
Nine months after AJ was born we found ourselves looking at a positive pregnancy test. On December 26th, 2019 we welcomed our 3rd son, Jude.
We are still figuring out this new normal. We wish our 3 boys were able to play a round of golf or swing on the swing set in the backyard together, but we know that AJ will forever be our angel. We have found that Greyson talks about his brother often, and we can’t wait for Jude to be able to join in on those conversations. Greyson said it best this year on the 4th of July or AJ’s birthday weekend – “I bet AJ is loving these fireworks for his birthday in Heaven.”
Adam and I have just started to learn about No Foot Too Small, and their mission. We could not be happier to support and be supported by other families who are also grieving the loss of their child or children. We look forward to joining the NFTS community in everything that they do and stand for. "
Adam, Abby, Greyson, AJ and Jude Luehmann – Waukee, Iowa
IN HONOR AND CELEBRATION OF AJ, DONATIONS CAN BE MADE HERE. ON BEHALF OF THE LUEHMANN FAMILY, THANK YOU FOR YOUR GIFT.